Ice Palace
by SurfandSnowRider
Summary: This story is in Elsa's POV and looks deeper into her childhood and what it was like being locked away in her room most of the time, unable to really play and enjoy herself like most kids should. Lost in her imagination, Elsa tries to make a way to deal with everything that has been happening to her.
1. Castle in the Snow

**So I went to the movies with my sister not thinking much of the movie Frozen and I came out an uber fan with this on the brain **** hope you enjoy, it's my first fan fic in ages **

** -Cove**

There's this place I like to go, when mother and father are out taking care of the kingdom, and when Anna is busy running around the castle talking to the walls and the servants. It's not a big place, it's not very warm either, but it's _my_ place. It's the kind of place where rules don't matter and magic is well…it's magical (not like this _curse_ that I have to live with).

Have you ever imagined such a place? Where boundaries are broken, hearts are touched and every time you visit your spirits soar through the ceiling and off into the sky where the heavens meet you and perfection is found. Most of all it's a place where fear is never found. Not in my heart, not in the air and definitely not on the faces of the ones I love the most.

I wish the whole word could see it, my Ice Palace. I can't even begin to describe what it's like living here. Oh! If you could see the details on ever icicle, every block of perfectly frozen water! The grand entry way that leads into a double cascading staircase that reminds me of the time father took us all on a royal picnic beyond the gates when we were so little to see a nearby waterfall in the summer.

Those were the good times, the happy times when everyone got along and you could see the genuine happiness and love on their faces. I feel as if my curse did more then just freeze my dear sisters head, I fear it froze everyone hearts as well. The trolls had said that a frozen heart is not an easy fix, in fact it's quite impossible, and I fear they were right. I seemed to have built a sold wall of ice between every one of my family members, including my parents. Life is never the roses and butterflies the villagers believe it to be, it is merely a façade created to hide what was really going on inside the walls of our home.

I long to be truly held again in my parents arms, to _play_ with my sister and share my ice place with her like I tried to do those years ago. Anna would love it. Olaf, my trusty servant is ever at my side to help me out when help is needed. Why just today he helped me pick out a new pair of gloves to wear that would look good with my dress.

"The ones with the ruffles, or the light blue ones that sparkle on the end?" I asked holding them up with a smile. My dresser made of ice gleamed in the daylight that poured in from the windows and the effect was stunning against the walls and celling. They sent huge rainbows scattering like a million different multi colored fireflies everywhere.

"Hmmm…Depends what your doing today. Are we greeting our loyal subjects or are we having a party?"

This made me stop to think, what _did _I want to do today?

"Why don't we greet our subjects at the party."

"Okay then the blue ones. I like shiny things. You know snow is kind of shiny in the sun. That makes me shiny too." Olaf said staring down at his feet with wide eyes.

I laughed and slipped on the blue gloves with a smile.

"I guess It dose."

"Now we are both sparkly! Oh can we have sweets at the party! And lot's and lots of hot chocolate! Ooo! Ooo! I know we can have a hot chocolate fountain with sweets all around and the guests can go swimming in it! Then we can set up a castle made of cake and…"

"Olaf you're getting ahead of yourself! We still need to make the list and plan everything out. It all needs to be perfect. Besides a hot chocolate fountain sounds stick and messy." I giggled as I made a list of ice in my hands and began to think of people I could invite to our very extravagant party.

"Yeah, and?"

"And people get unhappy when they are all sticky and messy. Like, remember when Anna tried to sneak chocolate from the dinning hall and got it all in her hair and it melted inside of her shirt? Mother made her take a bath and the servants were there for hours trying to get it all out. That was not a very pretty sight."

Olaf just stared at me.

"Yeah and….?"

I sighed and shook my head.

"Okay, we will have a chocolate fountain." I caved.

"YAY!" Olaf cried as something else caught his attention. He stared at a stray flake as I began to write down names onto the guest list.

"Fist we will start with Lord Furriface."

Olaf smiled and turned away from the perfectly frozen snowflake that drifted about.

"His beard looks funny."

I looked over at where the dignified Mr. Furriface sat against the wall and nodded. His beard was lopsided and matted a bit, and very long for a man of his high standings.

I cupped my hand over my mouth and leaned in close to Olaf.

"That's because he suffers from a rare case of The Fuzzies." I whispered.

"No." Olaf gasped.

"Yes." I nodded solemnly. "But he is okay with it now, he wears his beard with pride, and none can grow one quite to match its….uniqueness."

I smiled over at Lord Furriface and shook my head.

"Can I have a beard?" Olaf asked putting his hands on his cheeks. He pushed the snow in his face up a bit and smiled as he tried to make a beard for himself out of the surrounding snowflakes and what was already on his face.

I giggled and smiled and turned back to the list. As Olaf busied himself once more.

"There's also Lady Wobbles and her Husband Duke Limpington and we can't forget the good sir Pineneedles and…

_Thud, Thud, Thud. _

The knocking at my door pulling me out of my thoughts and I tried to ignore it as I looked down at my list.

"Elsa?" Anna called from the other side.

"Hey it's Anna." Olaf said shuffling the snow around him.

"Hey Elsa wanna come play with me? I got a new doll and this fun new toy called a bicycle. It has wheels you can push with you feet and they move pretty fast!" Little by little my Ice Palace melted away. First the dresser, then the ceiling with its intricate chandelier and lastly the perfectly carve ice walls.

"Come on Elsa, can't we play just this once?"

Lastly Olaf disappeared in front of my eyes as everything evaporated back into my mind, to be locked away by my fear, by the curse that held everything back. I slowly move to the door and put a hand against it, willing myself to feel my sister on the other side. To hear her breathing and her heart beat and to play with her if only this one time…

"You know we don't even have to go fast on my bicycle."  
I reached a hand for the door and realized it was ungloved a second too late. With lightning speed the cold cruel ice shot from my pale fingertips and consumed the handle, spreading like a disease on the door. I willed it to stop but it only grew worse with every breath I took in. I grabbed for my other glove and quickly covered my hand as panic welled up inside of me. What if Anna had seen?

My shoulder rested on the door and it froze the area it touched.

"Stop." I begged on the verge of tears. "Please…PLEASE STOP!"

But like all the other times before it refused my commands and took on a life of it's own, like an uncontrolled demon it fed on my weakness and only grew stronger.

"I'm sorry Elsa, I only wanted to play." Anna sighed on the other side.

I stood and shook my head.

"No it's not…"

"Anna! Leave your sister be, she needs her rest." I heard my mother call from the other side.

There was some shuffling and I could tell Anna was no longer leaning against the door.

"Bye Elsa." She said as the thick door between us muted her voice.

"Bye." I whispered.

I looked at the room around me and willed the Ice Palace to return, for the party to take place, and everything to go back to being the way it had been. I closed my eyes and pictured the marvelous staircase and Olaf standing right next to me but nothing came.

Instead when I opened my eyes again I was still in my room, empty and alone with nothing but the cold icy chill of my fingers and the fear that filled me to keep me company though the long day.

**As of now it's a one shot, but if I get enough positive feedback I may add to it. Still not sure thought, I have to Establish the story a bit more in my head as well :) **

**-Cove**


	2. Midnight Fun

I peeked out of my room with weary eyes as I tried to see past the darkness and shadows that seemed to consume everything in the dark midnight hallway. Step by step I made my way out of my room until I stood inches away form the window opposite my room. I took a deep breath and watched as it curled in the air around me. My bare feet froze the floor and I quickly put on the socks I had been carrying around to stop them from spreading my ice any further. The last thing I wanted was evidence all around the house.

"LET'S GO HAVE SOME FUN!" Olaf cried out as his voice echoed down the hallway.

"Shhh!" Elsa scolded. "You don't want to wake up Anna or my parents do you?"

Olaf looked over at where their rooms were, Anna's next to Elsa's and her parents on the opposite end of the hallway. He slowly moved over to where Anna's was and quietly pushed his head against the heavy wooden door.

"I don't think they are awake." He whispered back to her.

"Okay good, come on Olaf." Elsa said heading for the stairs.

"EVERYONE WAKE UP IT'S TIME TO PLAY! COME ON ANNA LET'S GO ALREADY!" He shouted running up and down the hall and banging on Ann'a door as he did do.

"Olaf!" I whispered trying to calm him down.

I stopped in front of my sisters door and held back, not daring to even touch it for fear my ice would somehow incase the entire room. The ice at my feet began to spread in small little crystals and patterns and I gasped as I stumbled back. Anna's door cracked open a bit as I pulled away and I could my dear sister fast asleep on the other side of the room lying peacefully in her bed. She hadn't head Olaf at all.

"Come one Olaf." I said tiptoeing away from the door as I made for the stairs. It was so tempting to just freeze the banister but I held back as we headed down into the grand entryway and moved for the back door. Before my sister's memory was erased and before I was too scared to even approach her, we would play in the large ballroom at night, but that place only brought back bitter memories and made me think of a future when Anna was not safe.

That was the last thing I wanted.

"So what are we doing tonight? Are we throwing a party? Or are we doing something else….like throwing a party."

I took in a deep breath and looked at my hands as I stood in the outside foyer that opened up into the garden area (though we couldn't really call it much of a garden because the cold always swept through and killed off all the pretty flowers in the winter).

"I'm going to control my powers." I whispered as I stared at my hands with a fierce determination and concentration.

"Oh I see!" Olaf was smiling up at me.

I imagined my ice palace extending all around me, turning the foyer into a lovely porch area that I imagined opened into an ice sculpture garden. Here I could relax and know that I was safe from everything, at least Anna was safe from me.

"Okay." I breathed.

With careful precision I watched as beautiful patterns flew in a small icy circle above my hand. A snowflake took shape and I was almost giddy with joy as I blew it into the cool night air.

"I did it Olaf!" I cried with joy.

"Hey, it's like me, only smaller and missing arms. Oh and a nose, and some buttons, and a face, and feet, and a mouth, and like a bazillion other flakes. Make some more!"

Elsa pulled off her other glove and held out both hands, watching as delicate little snowflakes fell to the ground all around them.

A light flickered in the window and I quickly lost all concentration as my very own Ice Palace faded away.

"Oh no…" I chocked back my fear as I tried to make the snow stop.

"Olaf what do I do if it's Anna." I whispered ducking behind a bush. There was no covering up the mess I had made with all my ice and in my state of panic I forgot my gloves in the middle of the foyer.

"We play in the snow, _duh._"

"This is serious!" I hissed.

The door swung open and a figure stood in the arch way with a lamp in one hand and a sword in the other.

Olaf hobbled over to where the person stood and held up his hand as he stared up at his opponent.

"Halt intruder by the name of her Majesty princess Elsa! If you wish to enter your kingdom you must first seek legal passage through Lord Furriface and…"

The man walked out into the Foyer and right through Olaf as he disappeared like a puff of smoke, invisible to the lamp bearing figure.

"Elsa?" A concerned male voice spoke. He bent down and picked up her gloves and turned them over in his hands and he sheathed his sword and looked around.

I stepped out from the bushes and approached slowly.

"Papa I…"

"What are you doing out at this hour? What of someone saw you?" He said sternly handing my gloves back. I took them and sighed as I slipped them back over my fingers, they reminded me of little cages.

"I was trying to practice control."  
HE bent down and sighed as he stared me in the eyes. After a moments pause he pulled me into a hug.

"You can't be doing it like this Elsa, what if Anna woke up and heard you? You could have been seen." He sad quietly.

"But it's not getting any better and if I don't practice how will I ever control it." I protested. "I don't want to be afraid any more."

He sighed and stared at the icy snowflake patterns on the floor and the bits of melting snow still left.

"Remember what I always tell you."

"Conceal, don't fell, don't let it show." I repeated.

Suddenly Olaf reappeared and stood behind my father, looking at him with wide eyes.

"Hey it's the king." He said poking his side. I held back a giggle as my father looked over at where I was looking.

"This is serious Elsa, you can't go using your powers like this anymore okay?"

"He's kinda squishy." Olaf commented now poking his cheeks and playing with his nose.

"Yes Papa." I said trying to ignore Olaf.

"You should invite him over to tea on day, maybe Lord Furriface can spread the fuzzies over to your father because this guy is seriously lacking in the whiskers department. I mean his face is soooo smooth!"

I watched as my father stood and motioned for me to follow.

"You're not going to tell mom are you?" I asked as I followed him.

Olaf followed behind as we went back into the dark halls of our home. Father held a light out to guide the way and I looked down at Olaf and then at my hands wishing everything could just be normal.

"There's no point in worrying your mother any more, just don't let me catch you out like that again." He said solemnly.

"But she made snow!" Olaf protested. "Can you make snow with your hands? I don't think so."

I slipped back into my room and went back into my bead and pulled the cover tight over my head. There was no point in pushing it now. Papa was always right and he had always helped me control my ability and there was no point in arguing or sneaking out again.

"Elsa…" Olaf whispered coming up close to my bed.

"I'm going to sleep Olaf, go play somewhere else."

He sighed and made for the door. I was surprised he hadn't just faded away like everything else.

"I'm going to go prove to you that your snow really is magical and wonderful." He said with a determined smile.

I only nodded as I drifted back into the world of Perfect ice when I was the princess and the whole world knew what I could do and loved me for it. I drifted off to a place where fear did not exist.


	3. Chocolate

**So I am trying to stay as close to cannon as I can, but I was listening to this song cut from the movie called 'We know better'. In the last few chapters I have been playing with the idea that all Elsa want's is what every other kid on the planet wants, including her sister, and that is to just have fun. I think that with younger Elsa there is more then just all the proper posture and composure and fear, something warm and innocent and imaginative that disappears when she gets older. Of course because of her powers she has to hide this side a lot so you don't see it in the movie. **

**Hope you all enjoy and Happy New Year! **

**-Cove**

I opened my eyes to the small sliver of morning light that pored in through the curtains hanging over my window. The sound of birds filled my ears and I rolled over and close my eyes under the safe cover of my sheets. Something felt off but I was too tired to respond to that annoying little itch in the back of my head.

"Elsa." Someone knocked at the door. "Elsa wake up."

"Go away Olaf." I mumbled as I rolled over again and created a cocoon of covers around my body.

"Elsa! Mom says we have to be dressed and ready for breakfast and lessons soon."

That was not Olaf at the door. It was Anna.

I peeked my head out and blinked away the sleep from my eyes as I looked around the room. My day dress hung ready for me to wear, and my two new pairs of gloves were placed on my nightstand to cover my hands.

"I'll be out in a minute Anna." I called

Something was off.

"COME ON ELSA!" Anna knocked eagerly. I could hear the excitement in her voice. Monthly supplemental lessons were one of the few times outside of meals and sit ins with our parents that we were together. For years I have been forced to hide and for years she has skipped to these particular studies with the thought in her head that maybe, just _maybe_ we would be able to have a little bit of fun. It made me smile to think about her spirit, but made me sad as well.

The feeling that something was not right stirred in my chest again.

"Elsaaaaaaaa!" Anna moaned. I heard her lean up against the door with a huff. "I'm turning into an old lady waiting for you. I can feel the skin sagging on my face as the seconds pass by!"

I laughed. That was my sister, the ever dramatic character, as if life was a stage and she was the actress.

I jumped out of bed, quickly put on my dress and tied up my hair as I recited fathers saying over and over again in my head.

"Control, control, control." I mumbled, completely determined to show papa and mama that I could handle the power inside, that Anna would be safe once more.

I stood at the door and took several breaths, controlling my emotions and feeling the fear rise up in at the idea that if I slipped up at lessons Anna would know the truth.

With one final breath I threw the door open and looked out at Anna who stumbled back as I held my head high and fixed my posture the way mother would show us during our individual manners and princess lessons.

"Uh…hi." She said rocking back on her heels and taking a step back.

"Good morning Anna." I said as I nodded and made for the kitchen.

We sat on opposite ends of the loooong dinning room table and I stared at my breakfast as Anna attacked hers with the furry of a hundred generals. The eggs were still hot and steaming and I grabbed my fork with a shaky gloved hand hopping that I didn't freeze it.

"Careful Sweetie, you don't want to choke." Mother said to Anna sitting somewhere in the middle of the table. Sometimes I didn't even get the chance to eat out in the dinning room with my family, on days when I can't hold back the cold. Those are always the worst.

"Your majesty." A guard said entering with a bow. We didn't have too many servants around anymore so the guards usually announced visitors.

"The tutor is here."

The tall lanky man who came in from the city walked in with books clutched in his hands and collar pulled high and tight.

"Your majesty." He said with a bow.

"Ivar! Do you have any maps or new books about far away places?! Oooh or fairy tales about Trolls or Valhalla and the heros?" Anna cried jumping out of her chair. She tripped on her way out the door and quickly picked herself up and bounded into the next room.

"Anna!" Mother cried out.

She shook her head and dismissed Ivar, turning her gaze over to me.

"Will you be okay today Elsa?" She asked with a soft concerned smile.

"Yes mama. I will keep myself composed." I said holding my head up high with confidence.

"All right, you can go join your sister if you want." I looked down at my barley touched breakfast and then back at the hallway that led into the royal library and study room.

"Thank you mama, I'll concentrate really hard for you."

She smiled brigand nodded as I cautiously got out of my chair and made my way over to the study where they were Ivar was already busy with Anna, diving into a history book.

"But this is booooring." Anna cried dropping her head into the spine of the open book.

"A good princess must know her kingdom's history."

"Elsa if you will start on your history as well I will be with you in a minute."

I took my seat away from Anna looking around at all the books and patterns and rune covered scrolls that filled our library.

We sat reading our books for the next half hour, I sat still starring at my hands and holding back the icy touch as best as I could. My fingers hovered above the pages afraid of what I might do to the book if I touched it for too long. Anna swung her feet back and fourth in the chair as she flipped from page to page with no real direction. She picked up a pencil and began to draw something on a piece of paper doodling as she smiled and looked back over at where Ivar sat reading a book.

I looked over at her and then shook my head and buried my head back in the history of Arendelle.

"Control." I whispered focusing hard on the words on the page as they turned into a foreign language. I couldn't concentrate.

I looked back up at Anna and watched as she continued to draw. She caught me starring and smiled as she held up her work of art.

"It's a snowman." She said beaming.

I nodded and giggled. Olaf was ten times better.

"Wanna play?" she asked her eyes lighting up with that mischievous excitement I used to see on her face when she was only a toddler, when we played together.

"We can't." I said firmly pulling my book back up.

"Awww come on Elsa, just this once. You're no fun any more." She whispered back.

"Girls." Ivar scolded. "If you have a question I am more then happy to answer it for you. We will have our outdoor lessons on nature in a little bit, so make sure you study now."

He turned back to his thick book and I tired to return to mine. Where was I again?

"I know how we can get out of here without being seen." She said looking back over at the bookshelves behind us. The thought was very tempting and I felt my hands slowly loosening their grip my book.

I pictured Olaf begging me to play with him and that funny butterfly feeling returned to my stomach. I should have just played with him a little last night to at least leave on a happy note. What was I thinking? Olaf wasn't real anyway.

"I also know where they keep a secret plate of chocolate in the kitchen."

I looked up at her and felt my resolve break. One little trip to the kitchen wouldn't hurt anyone and we could be back before Ivar even turned the page in that stuffy book of his.

"Fine, but we come straight back here." I whispered back.

Anna nearly fell out of her chair as she clambered out and ruffled her favorite green dress. With careful steps she ducked under the table and made a beeline for the bookshelves. As soon as she was hidden from Ivar's view she motioned for me to follow and then disappeared.

I looked over at our tutor and then cautiously followed her behind the book shelves.

"Come on Elsa!" she laughed as she opened the door that led into the large front entry way where mother and father used to hold balls and parties. The front door stood locked and ominous in the dark area as we walked silently passed it. I couldn't help but stare.

Anna pressed her small body up against the wall that led into another hall. She poked her head around and nodded with satisfaction as she grabbed my hand and pulled me along with quick determined steps. I quickly pulled away afraid of touching her with my cold.

"What if we get caught?' I asked.

"We won't." She replied with a wide smile. "I'm good at this."

She rolled under the dinning room table and I crawled after her as one of the palace helpers walked by eating a plate of something that smelled really good. I should have eaten more of my breakfast.

I held my breath and waited for him to leave, but Anna kept moving under the table until she reached the end and waited for me with impatience as I moved to catch up.

I imagined my ice palace once more, only this time we were moving to get away from the evil knights who came to raid the castle and steal all it's gold and kidnap the princesses.

"We have to be careful, the bad guys might catch us." I said smiling for the first time in front of Anna in a long time.

"Right, our goal is to save the stash of chocolate form the bad wizard. Are you ready?" Anna asked.

I sighed and looked at the door as it turned to ice and filled with sharp icicles and slippery snow. My attention turned to my hands. We had so few opportunities like this with each other and I chased the worry from my mind, just this once.

"Careful, there are booby-traps."

Anna nodded and stood, running for the door. She quickly peeked in and motioned for me to follow.

I ran to her and we both slipped into the kitchen.

"Where's the chocolate?" I asked.

My sister held her finger to her lips and I looked around at all the tools pots, and the huge fire place in the center. There were several islands in the middle of the room for the cooks to use while preparing the food.

"Duck." Anna said as we moved behind one of the Islands.

One of the cooks came in whistling as he grabbed a basket full of dried herbs and moved to flavor a half eaten plate of food.

I spotted the plate of Chocolate up on a shelf out of our reach and watched as it turned into a death trap and the cook turned into an evil monster cooking up some poor sap.

"It's a monster!" I whispered in her ear. She nodded and looked brave and determined as she took a peek herself.

The monster bumbled about and Anna signaled for me to move to the next island. I nodded and slipped over as he turned around momentarily distracted.

My heart was racing in a good way and I felt light and free and giddy. The last thing on my mind was my powers and their terrible curse.

The huge monster left the frozen icy cave leaving us alone and I stood moving to where the chocolate stood out of reach.

"Now what?" I asked.

"Now we climb the dangerous mountain to reach the gold." Anna said.

I watched wide eyed as she climbed up easily as grabbed the plate of chocolate.

"Carful Anna." I called up to her worried she was not the most graceful person in the world.

"It's okay." Anna Shot back.

I watched as her small bare feet hung on the edge of the shelf and her weight tottled, unbalanced. My breath caught in my throat as she swayed back and fourth, her dress nearly catching on ladles and sharp tools that hung on the shelves. She dropped down on the last step and stood before me beaming with a plate of choclate.

"See everything is okay."

Anna took one step forward and got tangled in her dress, losing her balance and falling face first onto the ground sending the small delicate chocolates flying in a shower of sweet confections.

I looked down at her with wide eyes and she looked up at me with a chocolate stuck in her mouth.

We burst out laughing at the same time as I looked around at the wonderful mess we had created. This was better then any ice place I could ever create.

"ANNA! ELSA!" I heard my father boom.

"Oops." Anna said with a smile and shrug.

I felt terror grip my heart as reality returned. The tips of my gloves began to freeze and I panicked as I looked over at Anna who stood munching on her sweet.

"This was a bad idea." I mumbled.

Without another word I took off down the hall hiding my gloves and heading straight for my room. I had lost control and look at the mess I had made, and my hands were begging to freeze again! I held back tears as I tried to compose myself and threw myself back onto my bed.

Papa and Mama would surly be disappointed.


	4. Dancing Lights

**I think Elsa's them song for this whole story is Cult Logic by Miike Snow for those of you who like music. Sorry if there are any grammar or spelling errors in advance. I hoped to have this chapter up earlier but my computer died and I lost everything so I kind of speed typed though this. **

**Hope you enjoy **

**-Cove**

I watched from the window as our tutor took Anna out in the garden for her studies. I could almost see her smiling again, completely distracted from the early event's I could her my parents scolding her from the hallway. Sneaking sweets was always looked down upon, but leaving studies was not allowed. Then there was the matter of the two of us being caught together.

I sighed.

This only meant our lessons together were over. Her routine of knocking on my door to wake me up every month and our silent study time with her tapping her fingers impatiently and zoning out for the lessons were over. What would she do next month when I didn't come downstairs?

"Anna…" I whispered through the window. Her head swiveled up to my window and I felt a rush of fear flood me. The window quickly froze over and I stumbled back. I could feel my emotions welling up inside of me. I clenched my hands and took another deep breath as I turned away and went and sat on my bed, waiting for father to come in.

What was the point in having a sister if you couldn't tell her all your secrets and have fun? That was all I wanted really…

The door turned slowly and I watched at both my parents slipped in and quickly closed the door.

"Elsa." Papa started. I could hear the words on the tip of his tongue getting ready to slam the gavel down for my final sentence.

"I'm sorry." I said looking down at my feet.

"I realize you were only trying to have fun but you are different." My mother said taking a seat on the bed next to me.

"What if you lost control again? What if Anna saw your powers, or worse." My father said turning to me.

"You realize what this means." I felt my mothers hand on my shoulder but I concentrated hard on my shoes. I buried my head in her sleeves and held back the ice moving at the tips of my fingers.

"It's okay, I need to learn control." I said.

"It's only until you can hide it." Father said optimistically. "You mother will help you with your studies if you have a question fro m now on."

I nodded and sat up. Control. That's what I needed.

"Everything will be okay Elsa. Remember conceal…"

"Don't feel." I sighed.

"That's my girl."

"But papa, I want to play, I want to learn with Anna I want to…" I quickly stopped feeling a deep sadness and longing fill me. The edges of my bed began to freeze and I jumped up and away from my mother. Starring at the ice patch on my bed.

"I don't want to hurt anyone, but I'm never going to get better! It's only getting worse." I said holding back a sob.

"Sweetheart." I heard my father started.

"I'm sorry. It's all for the best, I don't want to hurt Anna."

The both sat in silence and then my mother stood and moved to my fathers side.

"It's only for a little while." She cooed.

The moved for the door and just like that they were gone and I was alone again. I lay on my bed and huddled into a ball.

It wasn't until the sun had set and everyone went back into their rooms for the night that I sat up and pulled myself out from under the covers and pillows and the little cave I had made for myself.

I closed my eyes and pictured my ice palace filling the room. Tall ice structures and snowflake shaped designs filled my room as a clear staircase descended and led into an unknown part of my palace. I smiled a bit and imagined a long ice terrace outside of my window. Tall arches crossed the room with detailed cut outs and designs on them and at their center was a magnificent chandelier that hung precariously supported by a thing ice rod.

Now only one thing was missing.

"Olaf!" I cried feeling my heart warm up at the thought of playing with him again.

That feeling returned in my chest and I shuddered.

"Olaf?" I called.

I popped my head under the bed and laughed.

"Found….you."

Only he wasn't under there.

I looked over to my tall wardrobe and shrugged. He was probably hiding again, trying to scare the pants off of me.

"You can't scare me!" I cried as I threw the doors open.

The only thing that greeted me was several small mothballs that rolled onto the floor from the force of the swinging wooden doors.

"Hello? Come on Olaf…" I whimpered now.

He was only a figment of my imagination and was always the first to materialize and the last to fade away, he should have appeared by now. I had never had trouble imagining him up; it was always getting rid of him that could prove troublesome.

"Come on brain." I said thinking of him with all my might.

The room continued to remain empty.

_"I'm going to go prove to you that your snow really is magical and wonderful." _His words echoed in my mind.

"No…" I whimpered "Please…please come out."

I looked over at the door, the last place I had seen him as tears began to form in my eyes.

Without another thought I raced for the metal knob and flung it wide open. The ice around my feet was begging to spread but I ignored it as I took off down the dark shadow filled hallway and headed for the door. I took only a moment's pause at the top of the sitars as I watched snowflake pattered ice curl around my toes. My tired mind had thrown all cares at the window and I raced down the steps taking two at a time.

I stood in front of the large sealed door that led out into the courtyard, and beyond that the outside world. There was no way my little hands could open such a large structure but there were other ways.

My feet flew with a mind of their own out the side door into the garden area, I waited unit I was far enough from the Palace to utter a single syllable.

"Olaf!" I cried out.

I searched the bushes and everywhere inside the place garden. He couldn't have gotten far.

"Your not even real! You can't leave!" I cried out.

I felt the sharp points of frozen grass break underneath my feet as I made for the hidden ladder that led up into a small flat guard platform onto of the wall. I climbed quickly and looked over at the vast mountains and forests bathed in moonlight. The city stood off to my right peaceful in its quiet sleep.

"PLEASE OLAF! COME BACK!" I sobbed. "Please, I need you…I need a friend."

I starred up at the bright northern lights above as they danced in the sky, blurred and twisted by the tears that flooded my eyes.

"You can't leave me…" I whispered. I stood on the edge of the fence and held my hands out. If I froze the wall enough I could create a way out. Olaf had to be out there somewhere.

I took a deep breath and removed my gloves, focusing on the wall in front of me.

A rough and grabbed me and dragged me down from the wall before I could even conjure up a single snowflake.

"Stop no!" I cried.

"Elsa! What has gotten into you! This is very out of character!" My father scolded.

"He's gone! He's gone! It's all my fault he's gone!" I sobbed.

"You're lucky one of the guards saw you running out here. Imagine what the people in the city would do if they found out about you!"

"I need to go find him please! He can't leave me!" I cried out struggling against my fathers grip, completely out of my mind.

"Who?" My father demanded.

"Olaf!" I cried out

The world moved in slow motion as we inched away from the wall, away from wherever he had gotten off to. I watched as the earth bumped up and down and reached out my hands for the lights begging for their help, to return my magical friend back to me.

I reached my hand out and watched as the two porch doors slammed behind me. In that instant a burst of ice shot out from my hands and froze the door solid, locking me away and shutting me out an away from the only escape I had in the world.

Just like everything else, my curse took away my only peaceful place and locked me away in my own icy prison. My ice palace was nothing without Olaf to give it life.

I stared limply at the door until I couldn't bear to hold my eyes open any longer.


	5. Winter's Storm

**Here's something to clear away that Monday gloom for you**. **Next song in my Elsa Line up is 'Lessons' by SOHN. Hope your first day back to school (for those of you that go) wasn't as bad as most are. There may be a brief break, as I will be out a few days, and I have to think about where I want to take the story from here.**

** As always Enjoy! **

** -Cove**

A rough winter snow blew outside of my window, rattling the latch and shaking the palace grounds. The flakes fell like tiny fairies touching the ground in their final resting place. Nothing left but a hollow shell of ice. One of the windows flew open and a gust of ice laced air filled the room. My breath came in out a startled curly wisp but I otherwise ignored it. I never would understand cold like everyone else did. Shivering and bundled up they made out into the weather with war like eyes ready to beat it with a pile of wood and a tinder.

I looked back down at my book and sighed as a few flakes landed on the tips. I would be wise to close the door before was suspected of freezing the room myself.

Days seemed to fold over into months, which then formed a year and so on. years had passed since I had truly see and talked with Anna, years without Olaf and years without anyone but my books and my parents to keep me company. It was best for them, and it was best for me. My duty was to my family to keep them safe and to my mother and father to learn to control this icy curse and whatever storm raged on inside of me.

I gripped the sides of the widow seal and stared out into the dead garden below. The cold air kissed my cheeks and invited me into a dark place I new I truly belonged. No one liked the cold; no one would ever appreciate a winter's day like a warm summer afternoon.

"Elsa?" a faint knock on the door sounded and I quickly shut the window behind me. "Hey you want to play? I found these neat books in the library with some neat pictures. I know you like books, or we could try playing on the banister. Ivar showed me some _really _fun games before he left."

I took my seat at my desk once more and stared down at the black and white words.

"Come one, it's sooooo boring out here!"

I sighed, I felt like this was routine though. Time after time she came and as the days passed she would be there less and less.

"It's lonely all by myself, and there's only so much I can do alone." She said as her voice echoed through the door.

I pounded my fists on the desk and watch as icicles spiked out all around. Mother and father would be gone in a few months on their planned trip to do business with another kingdom. Their way of getting out and seeing the world while we stayed behind, stuck and locked away. Only I would never get that chance to truly be free of this place. Anna on the other hand…

"Please Elsa?" I saw her face peek under the cracks of the door.

"Stop It Anna! Just go away!" I was tired of living in fear, tired of dealing with powers that only grew as I grew. Being the eldest princess was hard enough without all the added ability to wield ice and snow. I wanted to get to know my sister, to play pranks on the cook and sneak away from lessons again. I wanted to dance in the snow and build Olaf, a non-talking real snowman with my sister.

I wanted my ice palace back, my childhood, everything that was slowly fading away and hanging just out of my reach.

"Anna, why don't you go and try out the new bike in the ball room." I heard my fathers voice speak from the other side of the door.

I stared panicked at the mess I had made and I quickly grabbed a pillow and a blanket and threw it over my desk. As fast as I could I grabbed the nearest book and jumped on the bed, trying to look comfortable as my father came in wearing his good winter coat. He had probably been out with the guards in the courtyard, or tending to the horses in the stables. Without a lot of help around the palace he was forced to work on some of the smaller simpler tasks.

"Elsa? How are your studies coming?"

I set the book down, not daring to look over at my sloppily covered desk.

"They are okay papa, how is everything in the place?"

He shook his head and looked back at the door.

"We are just preparing for the voyage in the spring. I can't believe this storm so late in the season."

I nodded as I pictured all the snow and beautifully frozen ice only inches outside of my window.

Control.

I let a long breath as I tried to rid myself of the longing, and the fear I had of giving into it.

"Are you sure you need to leave? You could always send someone else." I protested.

"Yes. There is pressure coming from the south. People are beginning to wonder about Arendelle and weather or not they should continue trade with a kingdom that keeps its royal family locked away. I promise you will be in good hands wile we are away."

I looked down at my own gloved hands. Father always ordered the best ones money could buy, and mother always new what designs to pick out. What if they found me and my powers what if I exposed myself?

"I can't help freezing things and I'm only getting more powerful what if something happens!"

"You will be fine. Remember, conceal, don't feel, don't let it show. You have always been a strong and brave girl. I need you to stay that way while we are away. Besides, your mother and I do not depart for another few months. We have to wait for the Fjord to thaw out."

I nodded and looked out the window.

"I'll call you down when dinner is ready."

My gaze was focused on the window and I listened as the door shut behind him. Mother would no doubt be in soon. I could read the expression on his face though. I knew he loved me, but I could tell my room was way too cold for his taste, for anyone's taste really. The tight lips, the wincing, the small shivers that ran up everyone's spine, the sighs were everywhere. Who could ever love something this cold?

I waited until all the noise in the hallway died away and then moved for the window as the flurry reached its peek.

"Control." I whispered.

With careful ungloved hands I threw them open and watched as my curtains flew on invisible strings in the air. I stuck my head out and felt the wind tug at my tightly bound hair.

"I _will _control you!" I cried out, my words lost to the silencing damper to the wind and soft powder.

My hands rested firmly on the widow seal and I held my breath as I faced the weather head on. All around me the flakes of snow drifted into my room and onto my floor creating a mess that would melt when the stoves and fires were stoked in the night.

I held my hands out and dared the snow to come any further.

"You don't scare me!" I screamed.

The snow kept on coming and I stood firmly. Dreams of ice palaces and talking snowmen were futile and unrealistic. No wonder I couldn't control my powers as a kid. Things were different now they had to be, for Anna's sake and for my family.

The snow came harder still and my heart began to race. I looked down into the white washed courtyard down below and caught a glimpse of something moving in the snow. The white shape was hand to see in the snow and I squinted. Suddenly the snow froze in front of me and I saw the object perfectly now. It looked up at me with wide goofy yet saddened eyes.

As fast as I could I shut the window and pressed my back against it as I felt for the latch. Fear swelled in my chest and I felt my hands grip and turn the curtains to ice.

Thoughts raced through my mind as I felt old memories sting at the back of my eyes. It was just a gardener or a grounds keeper or even a guard and I was hallucinating, and they could have seen me! Someone could have seen me what was I thinking? Clearly my mind was not thinking logically, and I let my emotions get the best of me.

I took one long breath and stepped away from the window. This fear was getting the best of me and all these grand visions of things that never were or ever would be. Mastery started with a calm head, mother had said that to me once.

"Control." I breathed standing up straight and fixing my dress.

I couldn't help but turn to the curtains and the window encrusted in ice and stray snowflakes. It was shut tight now, there would be nothing blowing it open for a while.

I double checked myself in the mirror, fixed a few strand of hair and faced the doorway, ready for my summoning's.

Dinner would be ready soon and I didn't want to be late.


	6. Interlude: Sledding

**Here's a little filler chapter, there will be a few more and then I will pick up the story again on Saturday with a full post. : )**

** -Cove**

"_Again, again!" a three year old Anna cried as I revealed my powers in a blast of magical snowflakes. We stood in the garden area surrounded by fresh snow from a winter storm that had blown in. I remembered Papa had promised to take us sledding us latter on in the hills beyond the village area. _

_ "Lets play something." I suggested watching with delight as the snowflakes reached the ground in a glittery dance. _

_ Anna smiled and threw a snowball at my chest and ran away laughing. _

_ "You're it!" she yelled running around toward the front side of the palace area. I ran giggling after her as a snowball began to form in my hands. I felts the icy wind kiss my cheeks and watched as Anna's turned a bright red. It was funny how normal people had to bundle up and the face turned red from the touch of cold. _

_ I launched the snowball at her as was came to the open front gates to the palace. _

_ "No fair!" she complained as her small feet caught on each other and she tumbled into a pie of soft powder. _

_ "Are you okay?" I asked dusting her off and helping her up. It was my job to make sure that she didn't hurt herself too much; after all I was her big sister. _

_ I received a shower of snow in my face as Anna raced for the front door to our home. The guards laughed as they watched us and one of the stable boys paused to see what we were up too. _

_ "Elsa, Anna." Papa called out as he opened the front door carrying a sled in each arm. _

_ "Who's ready to go sledding?" _

_ Anna jumped up and down as her hat began to fall off her head. I moved to fix it and smiled as Papa came up to us and smiled warmly. _

_ "Be careful!" Mama called out from behind and she hurried to the door and waved two pairs of mittens around. _

_ "Don't forget these and please stay out of trouble you three."  
Papa laughed and grabbed the mittens as he handed them to us. _

_ "We will do out best." _

_ I slipped mine on hesitantly and held out my hands to make fresh snow. Nothing happened and I quickly took them off trying to make it snow the way Anna liked. _

_ "Looks like the mittens stop your snow." Papa observed. _

_ "I guess so." I said with a shrug. _

_ The three of us made out way to the gate and I looked up at the guards standing at their post. This gate was meant to keep bad people out in case of an attack but I couldn't help but shiver as I passed through out onto the bridge and into the hills beyond the Fjord and the village. _

_ "I want to ride first!:" Anna huffed as she reached for the small red sled the two of us shared. _

_ "You can sled do with your sister." Father said. _

_ "No I want to go by myself." _

_ "You're still to little Anna." Father replied. _

_ "Am not, I got bigger." She said crossing her arms. _

_ I slid up next to her, knowing the tone of her voice all too well._

_ "But if you go alone then I can't use my magic to make the sled do fun things, don't you want to see the magic again?" I whispered in her ear looking up at Papa who was busy watching the kingdom over the water and the people that wandered about. He greeted every person with a warm smile and they greeted him back with a slight bow. _

_ This seemed to pacify her and she nodded. _

_ "Okay, but only this once." _

_ Anna surged forward as we neared the base of the hill. Children laughed and cried out as they played in the snow with each other and their families, all bundled up in warm clothing. _

_ "Let's go!" Anna cried running up the hill. _

_ I followed behind as Father nodded to the guard that trailed behind us. The two stood at the base of the hill never taking their eyes off of us as we climbed and pulled the sled along. _

_ The snow hill was round and the top led to the soft deep powdery woods on the other side and the slope closest to the bridge and the village. I set the sled away from the big crowd of kids poised precociously on the thin end that led in both directions. My feet held us in place as I waited for Anna to get on. _

_ "Lets go the other way!" Anna cried out laughing. _

_ "No we are going down there where father is waiting." I said _

_ She huffed and sat on the sled and I caught on too late as she pushed her feet backward and slid mine in the snow. _

_ "Anna!" I protested but it was too late, we were quickly gaining speed backward. _

_ "Here we go!" my heart raced as I craned my head backward to see where we were going. I held my hands out and created a small ramp that spun us around and faced us in the right direction. _

_ "Again do the magic again!" She cried out with glee as I tried to steer the sled around the hill. _

_ "Hold on!" I said with a laugh as we flew down, I held my hand out again and created a turn that would shoot us diagonally across the hill, hopefully around to where father was waiting. As the sled took a sharp turn I noticed a boulder sitting directly in our path and felt my fingers instinctively grip the wood tighter. No wonder no one ever sled back here. _

_ "Watch out!" Anna hollered. _

_ "I see it." _

_ I put my hands in front and created a small ramp over it. _

_ I closed my eyes shut and felt my hands frost the edges of the wood on m fingers as the sled caught air and we flew almost visible now. _

_ "On last trick, don't let go okay Anna." I said close to her ear so she could hear me but she was busy giggling and laughing, completely oblivious and enjoying every moment. _

_ I breathed and created a small ramp to catch us and keep us rom crashing into the snow, and then the sled was sailing around the hill and we were visible again. _

_ I could see the guard halfway up the hill with a stern look on his face, and father worried down below. We had taken too long. _

_ "We are coming in too fast." _

_ "PAPA LOOK!" Anna laughed. _

_ We reached the bottom and hit a bank of snow._

_ Anna flew through the air laughing and smiling and I rolled head first into the bank quickly pulling out and dusting the melting snow from my head. _

_ "Anna? Are you okay?" I asked as I pulled her up and out of the snow._

_ "Again, again! That was fun!" _

_ I laughed and watched as Papa came running after us. _

_ "How about next time we jus stick with the hill." I said to her, fixing her dress and dusting her off._

_ "Okay." _

_ The two of us smiled as we waited for Papa to catch up, even if we weren't supposed to go down that way I was still glad we did anyway. _

_ "Next time let's make a bigger one." She said pointing to the barley visible ramp around the hill. _

_ "How about next time we stick to making snowmen." _

_ She nodded happily. _

_ F there was one thing I was certain of, there would never be a dull moment In my life living with Anna. _

_ She beamed next to me and I couldn't hold back my smile. _


End file.
